Monday, 29 February 2016

Diary of an Honest Naturalista: Week 143



For the past one week, my life has been one long drag to another. I used to pride myself in having great endurance, but now I know that endurance is only easy when the situation has a specific end date. How does one endure when one does not know how long one is going to endure for?

This past week, I thought long and hard about many things, all which led me to no solution in site. I started the week by incessantly calling Dimeji. He never picked any of my calls, but later sent a message saying he is sorry but he feels it’s best we suspend calls for now. I was really hurt because it seemed to me like I had lost some of my hold over Dimeji.

At first, I assumed that since I was still talking with the other guy, it would help me cope with Dimeji’s separation from me. On the first day, it was alright. The next day, I tried a bit, but by the third day, I couldn’t take it anymore. I started yearning for Dimeji’s voice… the same voice that I had gotten so used to, and had become a bore.

Since Dimeji wanted complete separation, I couldn’t get to him. I started thinking of people I could report him to, so they could help me beg him. I thought of his brother, Kolapo, my mum, his mum, my sister, even my two younger brothers. Family was the only acquaintance we had in common, but all these people were unsuitable to report him to. What if they helped me beg him, and they truth of the situation came out? I know it is unlikely for Dimeji to spill the beans about what happened, cos he’s a very private person. I just couldn’t risk it, so I have decided to suffer in silence, and hope for the best.

I was supposed to sit down and do my twists this weekend, but the melancholic mood I was in wasn’t going to allow me embark on such a feat. Instead, I decided to go to the salon for an updo. Armed with a picture of what I wanted to replicate on my head, I proceeded to the salon.

The washing and steaming went well. As we were about to begin styling, a lady walked in with her boyfriend. Because the salon was full, they had to wait a while for her turn. I started admiring them and the love they couldn’t keep off each other’s eyes. And just like that, right in front of us all, they started engaging in PDA. It wasn’t the irritating, I can’t get my hands off your body kind of PDA, but the gentle, play with my cheeks and fingertips, don’t take your eyes off me kind of PDA. It was so cute that I even began to miss Dimeji more. Before I knew it, tears were streaming down my cheeks. My stylist noticed, and asked me what was wrong, but I quickly adjusted my eyes and said nothing.

Oprah Cry
Source
No matter how hard I tried, they tears couldn’t stop. I cursed the luck that brought me to the salon that day. I couldn't sit at home in peace, I couldn't go out in peace.

It was at that point the other guy called me. Immediately I saw his call, I hissed and cut it. He called like two more times, and I just switched off my phone in anger and sadness.

Aww, someone should tell me what to do to rectify this mess. I need to see an end in sight.

13 comments :

  1. wheeewww finally.
    ok that gif got me feeling for anna.
    so much remorse , guilty conscience, pain, hurt and Had-I-Knowns... awwwwwww anna dear.. nobody is perfect, your last resort is prayer and with the look of things Dimeji might come around. Dimeji is such a nice guy, to send a message to apologize for not picking your calls ... Despite the happenings, Dont loose him !

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  2. I told you, you would start looking for dimeji in the new guy and get bored wit him.. lol... thats one of the things long relationship does, most you revolves round him and he becomes your standard!Go and
    apologize.pele oh

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But really, should we make any human being our standard?

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  3. Apologise sincerely, don't hold back. Then let him be to sort out his feelings. No more calls. He is missing you too, trust, but give him a chance to miss you as much as you miss him. Please don't involve anyone,
    Dimeji is obviously a stand-up guy. Immerse yourself in a book for distraction. He'll come around.

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    Replies
    1. I buy the idea of her finding a distraction in the meantime. Emotions are intense at the moment sha.

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  4. i want to hug you... Don't worry everything will be fine with or without Dimeji. if youve been wrong by all means apologize and i hope everything works great!
    www.accordingtolarz.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol. I doubt Anna wants to hear the 'without Dimeji' part.

      Delete
  5. It will be alright.
    Just relax ya self.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amen o. Relaxation is the last thing on Anna's mind.

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  6. All has been said Anna. Just cry it all out, it will help a bit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol, then she should take into account all the advice everyone has given her here. Just that a good cry helps, not with the situation but at least its an outlet for the feelings.

      Delete

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